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Donald Trump Dr. Deborah Birx Dr. Tony Fauci National Press Conference

Press conference with Donald Trump (4/4/20)

Rather than presenting you with every single one of Donald Trump’s repetitions and half truths today, I would like to present you with a different story. I call this one “a tale of two comment sections”, otherwise entitled “THAT’S IT, I’M COMMENT SHAMING!!!”.

For the past week, I have scrolled past a different death in my facebook feed every single day. A friend’s pastor, a friend’s cousin, a friend’s father, a security guard I used to work events with… everyday I wake up and brace myself for the deaths as they get closer and closer to home.

Meanwhile, some yahoo in Oklahoma is sitting at home on facebook typing “FILM UR HOSPITAL, DR.FAUCI IS LYING!!! PIZZAGATE WAS REAL!!1!!!1” while drinking a Mountain Dew and adjusting their MAGA hat.

We are all one country, and I don’t want to end up hating the people in states who have been fortunate enough not to have been affected yet by this horrible virus. But, I damn sure wish they could shut up and learn to be a little bit more sensitive about what we are going through here in New York. In the end though, there is only one person to blame for all of this rabid ignorance and total disregard for human suffering, and that is Donald Trump.

Everytime Donald opens his mouth to say “FAKE NEWS” he chips away at people’s trust and common sense. He has created a fanbase that is completely immune to facts, and has weaponized them against the rest of us. I am entirely sick of his behavior, and so today I have decided to highlight some of the comments from The White House live feed, alongside his own quotes.

Donald readying himself to throw someone else under the bus.

DONALD: “We want as few lives lost as possible. It’s therefore critical that certain media outlets stop spreading false rumors and creating fear and then panic with the public. It’s just incredible. I could name names,  but it’s the same ones always, always the same ones. I guess they’re looking for ratings. I don’t know what they’re looking for. So bad for our country. And so bad… the people understand it. You look at the levels and the approval ratings, and they’re the lowest they’ve ever been for media. So bad for our country. So bad for the world. You oughtta put it together for awhile, get this over with, and then go back to your fake news.”

You guys, forget his years of training as a doctor! HIS BODY LANGUAGE CONFIRMS HE’S DISHONEST!
You guys, science is attacking Donald Trump! MAKE SCIENCE QUIET AGAIN!
To quote an old Klingon proverb; “ANYONE I DO NOT LIKE IS WITHOUT HONOR!”
“IT’S NOT HAPPENING TO ME PERSONALLY, SO I ASSUME IT’S A HOAX! ALSO PLEASE SUBSCRIBE TO MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL!”
“FUCK YOUR LOVED ONES!”
Research = memes I saw on Facebook. Also, I’m pretty sure we can cure this with essential oils.
“I’m sick of seeing news stories with facts I would rather ignore!”
You know what’s more dangerous than a virus that killed more than 600 people today in New York? *checks notes* CNN!!!!
Executive order to end one of America’s basic freedoms please! MAGA!
I AM WRITING IN ALL CAPS TO CONVEY THE SERIOUSNESS OF THIS MESSAGE!

DONALD: “New York is gonna be hit very hard, and uh… Louisiana is just… it’s just amazing the way it just sprung up. And everyone is doing a good job, but they’re gonna be hit hard. Areas in the country that are not experiencing large scale infections are requesting supplies beyond what they’re present circumstances require, and we talk to them, and we tell them, and we explain it, and for the most part they’re good with it. We think we’re right. It’s very understandable that officials would seek to get the most they can get for their communities. But, the fears of the shortages have led to inflated requests. We have some states, and areas, where they’re just asking for far more… I mean, look, we had one state asking for 40,000 ventilators. 40,000! Think of it! FORTY. THOUSAND. Uh… it’s not possible. They won’t need that many, and now they’re admitting they don’t need that many. But, we’re getting as many as we can to them.”

“Pffft… ONLY 630 PEOPLE DIED IN NEW YORK YESTERDAY! WHO CARES! JUST A FLU!”
Guys, remember when Andrew Cuomo was our president in 2015? HE DID NOTHING!!!

DONALD: “We want to finish this war. We have to go back to work. We have to open our country again. We have to. Open. Our country. Again. We don’t want to be doing this for… months and months and months. We’re gonna open our country again. This country wasn’t meant for this. Few were. But, we have to open our country again.”

“Don’t create a vaccine to end this! Jail the scientists and the people who fund them!”
Oh noooes! Evil scientist Bill Gates is going to infect us all with Windows 95!
BILL GATES STRIKES AGAIN!

DONALD: “Who ever heard of 180 million masks? And this is an incredible thing, a lot of the times, and we have to stop playing this game, if a governor wants 200 ventilators, and I say no we’re gonna send you a 1,000. We think you need more than 200. And then the media meets with the governor and they say, oh… you got more? Well, it’s not enough. The president should have sent more. So, he’s asking for 200, we give him 1,000, and they say how’s the president doing? He should have given more, cause that’s politics! That’s politics. And that’s unfortunate, because we can’t play that game. And that’s one party doing it, and the other party is happy. But, they’re all really happy because they should have been doing this work themselves for a long period of time. Many of their cupboards were bare.”

Kind of like what should have happened when Trump was impeached?
Uh-oh, someone is sad their favorite reality show isn’t popular enough to air on prime time anymore!
Damn it, she’s discovered my liberal addenda!!!
Would you like a live feed of the 630 people who died here in New York yesterday, sir? Would you like to speak to their families?

DONALD: “We have a great future, but we have to get back to work.”

PELISO HAS TO GO!!1!
I was only going to keep the top comment, but bonus points for the Alex Jones reference on the bottom! It’s like half a row on a right wing bingo card!
START TREATING PEOPLE WITH THE CURE WE DON’T HAVE IMMEDIATELY!
FIRE THE DOCTORS! PUT THE CAST OF CELEBRITY BIG BROTHER IN CHARGE!
“NO ONE I KNOW DIED IMMEDIATELY ON APRIL 1ST, SO I ASSUME THIS ISN’T REAL! SOMETHING, SOMETHING, SOMETHING THE DEEEEEEEP STAAAAAAAATE!!!”

I decided to skip the question and answer portion of tonight’s conference. I’ve had enough of Trump’s gaslighting and alternate reality for one night tonight. If you need me, I’ll be here on the couch watching TV with my cat while casually eating an entire jar of Nutella by myself.

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